Saying goodbye to a pet....this time, it was for real

So, a few weeks ago I took a break from blogging.

The week before that we were on vacation.

Well two days before we left for vacation, we had to put our 14 year old cat/friend/brother to sleep.

How to say goodbye to a pet

It was heartbraking.

It was an easy decision that was made by the vet.

It came down to quality of life, and life was a matter of days.

It was a relief.

This is how it played out:

I picked the girls up from their playdate and took them home and told them Sampson was very sick and he wasn't coming back from the vet. They've known for months he wasn't a healthy cat. For years we called Sampson "Fat Cat" but he hasn't been fat for about a year. They asked if he was dying. I said yes.

Then I explained what the vet had said, and that it would be best to put him to sleep where he would not feel sick, and not have any pain. Then I had to tell them we were driving there that night to do it.

uuuugh

The Mister drove to meet us but hit traffic. I called the vet and they said they would stay open as late as we needed them to. I headed off to the vet what I thought would be perfect timing but no, DC traffic never makes it easy. We had to wait for my husband to get there. Waiting and waiting and waiting....the girls lost it.

Then, he got there. And we went into a private room and got to say our goodbyes.

This was hard for the girls, but surreal.

What do you say? How long do you hold him?

How. Do. You. Say. Goodbye?

The girls were in tears.

I was detached. I didn't feel sad. I just felt empty.

My husband too was sad, but calm, and just dealing with it.

We both have had to do this before.

We both have had to say goodbye to people who were very close to us....our fathers.

Once you've had to find the words to say goodbye someone you love, to someone very close to you, to someone who will never see your children grow up or be there to give you important advice, and hug you when you think you've totally screwed up as a parent... saying it to a cat seems, well, easy.

That may seem harsh, but I just couldn't go there.

Not after where I've been.

Not yet.

But I had to BE there for my girls. And we did it. Together, as a family, we said goodbye.

And I'm so proud of them, and proud of us for how we did it.

Death is part of life, and everyone deals with it differently.

And that's ok.

The important thing is to deal with it.

And a week later, after we came home from vacation, I missed Sampson and I cried.

I finally said goodbye.

Janine

Here kitty, kitty, kitty

If you were my neighbor you would have heard a lot of this the past week:

"Fraaaaaaanklin!"

"Booooooo booooo!"

{shake, shake, shake, shake}

That's because our cat has been missing for a week.

He's not a big cat to begin with. Infact he's rather small and scrawny and skittish. We never imagined he would have ventured far. So for the past week we kept checking our surrounding neighbors' decks, bushes, and calling his name while shaking his cat food.

And the truth is...

Sometimes in the past year I've wished we had no pets.

When this one got out we considered (birefly) letting the other one out to 'find' him.

But I just couldn't.

And as much as I tried not to let it bother me, I missed Frankie.

For all the bitching and moaning I've done having to clean up cat puke and cat poop because they are having issues going into their twilight years....I love them.

And I missed having this little furball keep my lap warm while I work.

And I missed having to trick him out of my room when I go to bed at night (knowing he'll only wake me up too early in the morning).

And the other cat, Sampson, started to seem really needy and sad so I think he missed him too.

And around day 6 it started to REALLY bother me to the point of tears.

The kids were getting sad about it too. We posted a sign with his picture and our phone number.

And yesterday we got a call that someone about a half mile away had seen him...fighting with her cat.

Uh oh.

I was just getting used to cleaning out the littler box only once a week!

I was just getting used to not having to toss a cat off my lap during an important conference call!

But I got all heart-tingly when I heard my kitty might still be alive....and fighting!

So we hopped in the car armed with his food bowl, treats, a towel, a pet carrier, and my cell phone.

And we found him.

And now he's curled up in my lap as I type this.

Where he belongs.

Until he pukes.

Janine